Friday, October 24, 2008

Working out kills me

I went to the gym this morning. I went when there weren't many people there because I hate for people to look at me when I look like I am about to die. I went and I took a treadmill at the back of the room. I ran/jogged/walked/stumbled for 47 minutes. I burned 505 calories. I felt great....for about 6 seconds. Working out kills me. Correction, not all workouts kill me. Just workouts after long absences from the gym kill me. I've gone 4 times in the last 7 days. Before that, I hadn't worked out since....May. From January-May I went to the gym at least 3 times a week. The treadmill was my friend back then. I left the gym and felt great and in shape. I was almost fit. Then I got my job and working out wasn't as much of a priority. Quickly I stopped going at all. Until this week. Where in May, I would feel great; Now I feel like I can't even walk. The impending pain that I know is coming has almost kept me from the gym altogether. I don't even want to go because of how much it will hurt afterward.

My spiritual life is the same way. At times, I'm going strong. I spending time in God's Word. I'm spending time in prayer. I feel great afterward. I have a spring in my step and my thoughts aren't far from God. Then for whatever reason God loses priority in my life. Work is keeping me busy. I want to spend more time with my wife. I love sitting on the couch eating Chick-Fil-A. None of these things are bad, when they are prioritized behind God. It's when the replace God altogether that they are detrimental.

At some point I realize that I've gotten pretty far from God. My personal time with Him has shrunk to almost nothing. I find myself thinking, I'll pray after I finish writing this talk. Then it hits me. I need to get away with God. I need to spend time talking to Him. I need to dive into His Word. I'm terrified though because I know it's not going to be pleasant. While I was away I did some things and thoughts some things that I know weren't good for me. I rationalized things that I know were wrong. I know that coming before God is going to be painful and that I might find it tough to walk at first. It's going to hurt confessing and repenting of some things. But just like the gym if I can have the discipline to get through those first moments back with God, then I'll start feeling good again. I start to grow closer to God. My life will receive joyfulness and peace in Him. I'll start to become spiritually fit.

So I think I'll go work out for a change.


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